omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
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