Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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