weddingsv make me drug and hornr
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I will be naked everywhere
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
