Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
