alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
