Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
How drunk are you?
Completed.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
