i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
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