so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
