Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"

Fav 11 1074 1865
share tweet
(307): View more from Wyoming

If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...

Fav 24 5830 1108
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.

Fav 24 5795 1070
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

I like it rough

Fav 38 7162 1971
share tweet
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(425): View more from Washington

Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.

Fav 32 1664 9227
share tweet
(401): View more from Rhode Island

5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now

Fav 18 2487 2055
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(605): View more from South Dakota

After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.

Fav 6 2513 1093
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(920): View more from Wisconsin

we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!

Fav 14 695 2095
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?

Fav 3 880 533
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT