also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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