If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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