How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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