i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just cut my nipple shaving
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I had to cum in my sink.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
