So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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