@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize