Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
