i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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