worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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