maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
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