I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
