i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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