At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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