She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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