That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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