just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm like, not good at living.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
