Texts From Last Night

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  (863): View more from Florida

  I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..

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  (863): I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex.. http://tfl.nu/ynb7
  Replies (121) Good night (4432) Bad night (63039)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again

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  (519): oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again http://tfl.nu/6u76
  Replies (22) Good night (7199) Bad night (869)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.

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  (203): You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace. http://tfl.nu/24s5
  Replies (48) Good night (7148) Bad night (1093)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL

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  (813): He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL http://tfl.nu/4831
  Replies (56) Good night (1610) Bad night (6124)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer

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  (702): I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer http://tfl.nu/pk2a
  Replies (12) Good night (4132) Bad night (1368)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.

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  (407): I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test. http://tfl.nu/drd9
  Replies (17) Good night (5773) Bad night (1294)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.

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  (505): new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse. http://tfl.nu/qxpq
  Replies (6) Good night (2562) Bad night (758)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing

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  (810): There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing http://tfl.nu/i1k5
  Replies (7) Good night (2773) Bad night (1107)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?

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  (763): how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea? http://tfl.nu/6syz
  Replies (12) Good night (2795) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n

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  (616): at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n http://tfl.nu/8ho6
  Replies (6) Good night (1388) Bad night (812)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember

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  (251): He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember http://tfl.nu/p8oz
  Replies (2) Good night (1618) Bad night (796)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing

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  (775): I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing http://tfl.nu/nqjl
  Replies (6) Good night (1080) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.

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  (860): So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled. http://tfl.nu/ouz2
  Replies (6) Good night (1942) Bad night (475)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.

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  (203): We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed. http://tfl.nu/i2gt
  Replies (1) Good night (1055) Bad night (409)
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  (510): View more from California

  Naked. naked and bneed help.

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  (510): Naked. naked and bneed help. http://tfl.nu/5da4
  Replies (1) Good night (321) Bad night (404)

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