And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I love you. Go after that dick