I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
