I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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