He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
It's blow job season.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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