I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I feel like abortions should bother me more
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
