omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
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I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
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Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.