So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
