i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
