WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
