Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Please don't give away my fajitas
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
