That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
