And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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