Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
