She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
