What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize