Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
