Porn is love you can see.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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