Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize