Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize