I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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