is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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