Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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