I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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