Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
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