you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
